Advice for older women dating younger men
The days when dating a younger man made you a ‘cougar’ are long gone. Today, women dating younger men is becoming more and more common.
While this type of relationship has challenges, it can unlock an excellent way of life if you’re committed to making it work.
A study conducted by sex psychologist Dr. Justin Lehmiller surveyed 200 heterosexual women in relationships, including the age of their partner and how satisfied they were.
He found that women over ten years older than their partners were the most satisfied with and committed to their relationships than women who were younger than their partners and women whose partners were close in age.
Lehmiller believed this might be “because it might shift the power dynamic toward greater equality.”
If you’re an older woman dating a younger man or need some advice, we’ve rounded up everything you need to know, including expert tips to take away.
Younger men come with less baggage.
Younger men are likely to have experienced fewer relationships. An older man might be divorced, have children, or even grandchildren, which can complicate future relationships, especially if they’re not on good terms with exes.
When you’re in your older stages of life, dealing with the baggage can sometimes be hard. So finding love with a younger man could give you that independence you want.
“Men can have preconceived notions about women and relationships based on past experiences,” says Samantha Daniels, a professional matchmaker and president of Samantha’s Table Matchmaking.
“The younger and less experienced he is, the more open he’ll be to your relationship.”
It’s all about connection – no matter what the age difference.
Whoever you choose to date, you both must have a great connection, or it won’t last. Finding someone who has the same hobbies and interests as you will go a long way in building a long-lasting relationship.
Some of the most celebrity couples in the world have significant age gaps. In many cases, ten years or more, so it’s possible to forget the age gap and focus on being together as a couple.
According to a 2017 study from the dating website EliteSingles, 450,000 male users between 20 and 29 preferred dating an older woman (with 11 years being the most desirable gap). So plenty of men on the dating scene are looking for older women.
It’s more common than you might think.
Research carried out last summer by McGill University’s Milaine Alarie and Jason Carmichael concluded it’s common for older women to date younger men.
After pulling data from the National Survey of Family Growth, the Canadian initiative found that approximately 13 percent of sexually active women between 35 and 44 have slept with a man at least five years their junior.
And not only did they discover that middle-aged women who’d been previously married were more likely to seek a younger mate. They also showed that relationships with older women/younger men are rarely brief flings (on average, they last for two years).
Younger guys can bring out your sense of adventure.
It’s unfair to say that an older woman dating a younger man is for her to recapture lost youth. Nevertheless, there is a sense of adventure when dating a younger man at this stage of life.
With fewer family demands and other financial or lifestyle constraints, dating a younger guy can mean a greater chance of getting out there and experiencing new things.
Jess Carbino, the former in-house sociologist for dating apps Tinder and Bumble, says that her research with women over fifty revealed a strong desire to date men eight or more years younger. They want this because they assume the age group will be more open to new experiences.
“They find the aging process for men to be more accelerated than among women, in terms of their desires for exploration, and are interested in younger men who may be less set in their ways,” she says.
Younger guys will love your confidence.
With age comes wisdom, life stories, and confidence that younger women don’t always have – beautiful to many men looking for a partner who knows what she wants and knows themself.
That self-assured vibe and “profound sense of purpose” can be a siren call, says Paulette Sherman, psychology, relationship expert, and author of >Dating from the Inside Out.
And for the rare young-yet-mature man who’s got his life together “but is struggling to find a similarly-positioned woman his age, older women may seem like a perfect option in terms of a romantic partner.”
The sex can be amazing.
Sex is an integral part of any relationship — especially in later life. The reason could be that men are still experimenting in bed and have an increased libido.
Older women (especially those over 50) often shed their inhibitions about their bodies, giving them confidence between the sheets.
They’ve also experienced sexual partners, meaning they probably know what they want and won’t be afraid to tell you!
The theory that men’s sexual peak hits decades earlier than a woman’s, making an 18-year-old man and a 35-year-old woman unlikely-yet-perfect bedfellows, comes from a study conducted in 1953 (and the existence of a “sexual peak” is highly debatable).
Lots of older women are dating younger men and enjoying themselves!
If you’re looking to date a younger man, the best thing to do is try it! Please read some of our dating website and app reviews and sign up for your favorites today. You never know; love might be just around the corner.